One disciple asked his teacher, “You said backbiting hurts three people.”
“Yes. It turns the backbiter, the listener, and the one who gets backbitten into victims.”
“So what should I do in order not to backbite others?”
Pleased with his disciple who was going to do as he learned, the teacher responded with a smile, “Think of three things before you talk about others: First, ‘Did I hear and see it myself?’ Second, ‘Is what I’m trying to say a good thing?’ Third, ‘Is it necessary for me?’ ”
Not to forget his teacher’s teaching, the disciple repeated to himself what his teacher told him. Looking at him, the teacher said again with a gentle smile, “The simplest and easiest way is to think the person whom you are talking about is right next to you.”